Suited Up

November 27 — Laura House

Memories of the clothing that Nathan wore throughout the years bring a smile to my face and warmth to my heart. I picture him as a toddler in his overalls and fireman’s hat, usually with a hammer or some other tool in his hand. I can see him sitting with “Big Bunny” in his navy astronaut suit, wearing his red bathrobe, or in one of Gary’s T-shirts that he loved to wear. (See gallery below.)

Cowboy boots, shorts pulled too high above the waist, knee-high athletic socks, a tucked-in T-shirt, and a coonskin hat were Nathan’s favorites at age seven. Have you ever climbed a tree while wearing cowboy boots? It can be treacherous and the practice was eventually outlawed at our home. Those boots were worn pretty much everywhere we went, regardless of the rest of the outfit, and often, this ensemble included a cowboy hat instead of the coonskin one. 

All of us remember the day we bought his swim team swimsuit.  If you’ve ever been on a swim team, you’ll know that male swimmers compete in small swimsuits that help increase the speed of the swimmer, unlike a baggy suit. After taking his Speedo into the dressing room, seven-year-old Nathan poked his head out a moment later, looking a little shy. Timidly emerging with the tiny suit on and realizing that very little of him was covered up, he asked intently, “Is this okay?!” 

He was a natural and so cute to watch flying through the water. Making the Wilmore Dolphins team a family affair, Gary served as president, I helped during the meets, and all three kids swam on the team. Memories and lasting friendships abound.

When Nathan was nine, we had the opportunity to have a professional picture taken while on a field trip to the Henry Clay home in Lexington, Kentucky. My plan was to get a close-up of all three kids sitting on the historic stone wall. As we headed out the door to hopefully be on time, Nathan and Ryan informed me that they couldn’t find any socks. “No worries. No one will notice that in the picture. They won’t see your feet.”  I’m sure you can guess the outcome, and I’ll tell you that it’s now one of my favorite pictures.

Hoodies. It seems that everywhere I look, I see one. Nathan loved hoodies. As a teen, he wore his HAHE basketball hoodie everywhere. In his early twenties, green or gray hoodies and sometimes zippered sweatshirts with a hood comprised his after-class attire. Driving to Indiana for Nathan’s memorial service and to bury his earthly body, we stopped at a Chipotle for lunch and noticed a young man across the room. From the back, he looked exactly like Nathan, so much so, that we all felt the need to see the front of the guy. Knowing that Nathan was gone but also knowing that this hooded guy’s back was identical to Nathan was a bit eerie. We intentionally walked past him to get a better look. It was, of course, one more confirmation to our newly-shocked brains that Nathan wasn’t part of our earthly life anymore.

T-shirts were also part of his usual wardrobe. As a teen, his 1501 robotics team T-shirts were his preference. I’m grateful to still have three of those. Every birthday and Christmas, I added to his ensemble of techy T-shirts. There was the “Trust me, I’m an engineer.” shirt, the “Engineer’s Motto: If it isn’t broken, take it apart and fix it.”, and the “I Void Warranties” shirt. Finally,  “There are only ten types of people in the world: Those who understand binary and those who don’t.” I had to have him explain that one to me and to be completely honest, I just Googled it again to remind myself of the explanation. If you understand it without Googling, then I’m quite impressed! (Or you are an engineer.)

Then there was the array of golf shirts that he owned to wear with jeans to his college classes. He was especially handsome in the powdered blue and yellow ones. 

I’m amazed at how important these memories of clothing seem to be. If you are a bereaved mom, then I’m guessing that you can picture your sweet child’s clothes through the years as well. Oftentimes parents take their child’s clothing and make a memory quilt, pillows, or stuffed animal. Since we have so few items of Nathan’s, I don’t want to cut anything up to make one of those, but I hope you have plenty. These items can be a very special way to remember your sweet child.

I’ll end with one more clothing story. For the first two years after Nathan died, we had his winter jacket hanging in our front closet. It was in perfect condition since he rarely had to wear it in the mild winters of Virginia. Every time Gary and I got out our own coats, we’d see his, and touching it and thinking of him wearing it was comforting to us.  But when we moved back to Virginia after two years in Oklahoma, we packed up the front closet and made a shocking discovery. That special jacket still had a price tag on it! For the past two years, we had found comfort in a jacket that was never worn by Nathan! Only then did I vaguely remember that I had found a clearance sale and bought him an extra one. We laughed at ourselves for that one.

Writing about all of this clothing makes me contemplate what the Bible says about what to wear, which leads me to think about the following passage. It’s not referring to actual clothing like hoodies and T-shirts, but what a fabulous picture to remind us of the most important things to put on each day! And unlike our human wardrobe, putting on this spiritual wardrobe gives us strength and power. Don’t begin your day without them.

Ephesians 6:10-17: “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”