November 7, 2026 — Misty West
Though I personally know the Lord’s tender care, patience, and love in my grief journey and have been encouraged through the scripture and by the Holy Spirit, sometimes my heart is pricked when I read scripture and I think, “Lord, I see you doing this for me, but why didn’t you do this for Jonathan?” (We lost our awesome young man to suicide.)
One day when I was wrestling and praying about this, a scene popped into my mind from A Horse and His Boy by C.S. Lewis:
“After talking to Aslan, Shasta realized this powerful lion who comforted him was the same lion who scared him on the road, hastening him to complete a time-sensitive goal, and was the same cat that protected him in the graveyard. He realized that Aslan had been guiding his steps, providing, and protecting through the entire journey. Then Shasta asked Aslan about a friend and Aslan’s interaction with her.
Aslan responded, “Child, I am telling you your story, not hers. I tell no-one any story but their own.”
Though not scripture, the Lord used the story to remind me of many aspects of my relationship with Him:
- His ways are higher than my ways
- He is sovereignly and lovingly overseeing all regarding me
- He redeemed me. I am His.
My heart was comforted knowing that just as the Lord is working in me and faithful to me, He also took care of Jonathan. I look back and can clearly see many ways the Lord cared for Jonathan and was faithful to Him. There are many ways I will never see—but that is Jonathan’s story.
“You follow me.”
After Jesus told Peter to tend and feed His sheep, Peter noticed John following them and asked Jesus about John’s future: “When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, ‘Lord, what about this man?’Jesus said to him, ‘If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow me!’ — John 21:21-22
I smile at how Jesus responded to Peter, the forgiven, restored disciple who still had a thick head at times…like me. The Lord’s command to me is to follow Him.
Follow Him…
- trusting His character;
- trusting all He has laid out in His Word for my comfort and help
- trusting the Holy Spirit’s work interceding for me, transforming me, and helping me understand His Word more deeply in each circumstance.
Why can I trust Jesus?
Jesus…Creator of our world with Father and the Holy Spirit (John 1)
Jesus…who, in His steadfast love, left His glory in Heaven to endure bounds of human existence.
Jesus… who, while living sacrificially, endured mocking, unbelief, false accusations, betrayal, beatings, anguish, and death.
Jesus…who demonstrated His power over nature, sickness, demons, and death.
Jesus… who willingly gave himself as a sacrifice on our behalf to take the consequences of our sin, and deliver us from the power of sin, the kingdom of darkness, and God’s wrath.
Jesus…who rose from the grave, conquering death and giving us hope.
Jesus…who is compassionate, gracious, slow to anger, abounding in steadfast love. (Ex. 34:6)
Jesus…who invites us to His throne of grace to receive ongoing mercy and grace in our times of need. (Heb. 4:16)
Jesus…who binds up the brokenhearted. (Ps. 34:6, 147:3; Is. 61:1)
Jesus… who in the final days will destroy Satan, death, all enemies; who will create a new heaven and earth; who in all His glory will dwell with His people
This is Jesus who I am following. My Redeemer, the author and perfector of my faith, the lover of my soul; the One who is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of His nature, who upholds all the universe by His power (Heb. 1:3). Almighty, yet very, very personal.
I am to follow…
…Not after I understand His purposes
…Not after I get my answers
…Not when I feel like it
I am to follow and obey now. And yet, when we are brokenhearted, the idea of obedience can be daunting, as if there are more things being heaped upon us when we are already weary.
Praise God! He is not over us with a stick demanding that we get ourselves together. No, He doesn’t break a bruised reed or extinguish a faintly burning wick (Is.42:3, Matt 12:20). He is gentle with those hurt by this world. He is loving, compassionate, and gracious (Ex 34:6).
Therefore, in our grief and questions, let us guard against the same doubts that the enemy used against Eve in the Garden—doubts of God’s goodness, love, and faithfulness. Let us not give up ground that the Lord has already worked in us. As Paul says in Philippians, “let us hold true to what we have attained.” (Phil. 3:16)
Let us go with confidence to the throne of grace to receive mercy and grace in our time of need for whatever is before us, trusting that He will continue the good work He began in us; trusting that He will grow our understanding of who He is and help us to trust Him more. (Heb.4:16)
When I wonder about the Lord’s faithfulness or I fear for the future, I can be confident in Jesus and trust Him for myself and others. It takes practice to take Him at His Word. I can remember that just as the Lord is working in me, He is actively at work in each person in my family. Just as He has been faithful to me, He is faithful to the friend burdened by many cares, He is faithful to fellow grieving parents… and He was faithfully ministering to my son. I can also trust that since “there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,” my son is at peace knowing full mercy, love, and joy in the Lord’s presence.
The Lord is faithful.
