God Speaks to Brokenhearted People
August 15, 2026 — Pam Stalets
Many bereaved parents talk about the "before and after" that comes with losing a child—the person they were "before" versus "after" regarding their identity, values, and perspective on life. I experienced a shift I didn't expect to be so profound: the "before and after" of my Bible reading.
Being a Christian and a student of scripture for thirty-six years before Robbie passed, reading and understanding God's Word had always been important to me. However, after Robbie died, it was like reading the Bible through a different set of eyes—eyes that now saw through a broken heart.
It was astounding to me just how much God speaks to brokenhearted people in His Word. How could I have missed this before? It was everywhere. I saw this theme in the obvious passages and the not-so-obvious ones. How wonderful it was to discover afresh the great love and compassion that resides deep in the heart of God for those who are hurting. He speaks to people just like you and me broken, confused, disappointed, and in need of a compassionate, patient Savior.
My son has been in heaven for 11 years now. I would like to share a couple of those scriptures that helped me connect with God—or, should I say, reconnect—when grief bore down so hard during those first few years. The depth of brokenness that the human heart can experience is profound. I never knew this level of pain existed until I lost my son.
Here is what God says about it in Psalm 34:18: "The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart and saves such as have a contrite spirit." (NKJV) In the original Hebrew, the word for "broken heart" or "brokenhearted" means to break in pieces, to rend violently, to wreck, to shatter, or to cripple. Does this sound familiar? He knows how deeply we hurt, and He promises to be near.
Consider what happened to the prophet Isaiah. He experienced the death of King Uzziah, which had a massive impact on him. They were contemporaries, and Isaiah had regular interaction with the royal court. Yet, it was in that time of grief that the Lord’s close presence shifted his perspective from an earthly kingdom to a heavenly one. As Isaiah 6:1–3 says: "In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord sitting on a throne, high and lifted up, and the train of His robe filled the temple. Above it stood seraphim; each one had six wings: with two he covered his face, with two he covered his feet, and with two he flew. And one cried to another and said: 'Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts; the whole earth is full of His glory!'"
Consider also what happened to Stephen as he was being stoned to death for his witness of Jesus. Acts 7:55 tells us: "But he, being full of the Holy Spirit, gazed into heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God."
God has His way of making Himself known to us, especially when we are completely broken. I have often thought: why is it that brokenhearted people, or those who have come close to death (either their own or someone else's), see God so intimately? For Christians, a complete change in perspective—shifting toward a more heavenly view—seems to always be part of the journey. Perhaps it is because He must draw so near to us, reaching deep inside to the very depth of our being where "broken" has struck, just to help us. Like the "Footprints in the Sand" poem, He is nearer than we realize. He is so close that His whisper feels like a shout; we can hear Him even in the noise of chaos.
So many bereaved moms have told me, mostly in the early years of their grief, that they are keeping God at a distance. In the wake of losing a child, this is not uncommon. In my early grief, I did this too. I would tell people that I was keeping God at arm's length. Yet, His relentless love and deep compassion eventually get around all our barriers. In time, and with hindsight, we see this clearly.
Consider the familiar story of Mary, Martha, and Lazarus in John chapter 11. It was reading this again "after" Robbie passed that my eyes were opened to things I had never seen in the "before." Lazarus's sisters, Martha and Mary, sent for Jesus to come and heal their brother because he was terribly ill. By the time Jesus arrived in their hometown of Bethany, Lazarus had already been dead and in the tomb for four days. We know how this story ended—Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. But it is in the interim that I want to dwell, specifically in how Jesus responded to Mary.
Why Mary? We know a bit of history about her. She is the sister who previously sat at the feet of Jesus, undistracted and intent on learning from Him, while Martha rushed around the house. She is the same sister who, later, anointed Jesus with costly oil and wiped His feet with her hair. She was a woman of deep faith who loved the Lord. However, when Lazarus died, she struggled. When Jesus came near to town, Martha ran out to meet Him, but the Bible notes that "Mary was sitting in the house." She stayed back, hurting and questioning. When she finally did see Him, she said the same thing Martha did: "Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died." I think we can safely assume she was disappointed that things did not go differently. Even the strongest of us experience these struggles.
But here is the marvel in her story. In John 11:28, Martha comes back to her and says, "The Teacher has come and is calling for you." I could weep at this. Jesus knew how broken she was, how disappointed she was, and He reached out for her anyway. He called her to Himself just as she was. His love was relentless. And the amazing thing is that when she heard He was calling for her, she rose quickly and came to Him.
The Bible does not tell us that Jesus explained to her why He waited for four days before coming, or that she received explanations to her questions. He just called for her, and somehow that was enough. When Jesus speaks to our hurting hearts, it isn’t always with explanations to our "why" questions either. He answers us with the comfort of Himself, and somehow that sustains us until eternity brings a greater understanding.
Friends, nothing heals a wounded, hurting soul like hearing Jesus speak directly into our sorrow. He knows how to do this specifically for each one of us. For me, He did this through the GriefShare program. Just sitting with His Word, certain scriptures would jump off the page like a healing salve to my heart. He also connected me with ministries like Our Hearts are Home, where listening to other bereaved parents share their journeys brought immense comfort.
As for Lazarus, we know his earthly story ended well. However, Lazarus would eventually die again. His sisters, if they outlived him a second time, would have to fully embrace the hope of eternal life—the very perspective Jesus gave Martha while Lazarus was still in the tomb.
I live every day with the hope of the Lord's return. This world is not our home. The Bible tells us to "look up, for your redemption draws near" with a cross-reference to Luke 21:28. Our citizenship is in heaven, and we all have precious treasure stored up there. Mine happens to be named Robbie.
